Solstice of Saturnore

"I think we should break up."

I stand up, taking my glasses off and putting them down on the table next to where I am sitting. My puppy dog eyes are locked onto her face, waiting for her reaction. I see her pupils dilate as she looks back into mine. She too stands up and begins to walk away from me, towards the front door.

"You're right," she says. "It's probably best if we do."

I couldn't believe what she said. Did she really just agree? I didn't know how to react or even what to say. So I just sat there in silence as she walked out of the apartment that we had shared for the past few months. As soon as she shut the door behind her, it hit me like a ton of bricks that she was actually leaving. My stomach twisted into knots as tears began to well up in my eyes. I heard the sound of a hovercar engine turning on outside and watched helplessly as Xantha drove off into the distance, fading into nothing but a speck in a matter of seconds. She was really gone now and I had no way of getting in touch with her anymore; not that I knew anything about her anyway. In fact, I barely knew anything about anything anymore. Somehow, though, I had ended up here in this situation with someone who seemed so perfect for me at first, but now was far from it in every sense of the word.

The first time I met Xantha was in a bar called The Afternoon Snooze, which is ironically what most people would be doing after work instead of going to a bar at night to get drunk and hopefully meet someone special with whom they could go home with and have sex with only hours later. But, as you can tell by now, that wasn't exactly my scene; not that meeting Xantha was either. All my friends told me how stupid it was to go out alone looking for someone on your first night out at a bar when everyone else there was looking for the same thing and were not afraid to make things very clear by wearing their intentions on their sleeves (which usually came off later). But none of those things ever bothered me because they weren't nearly as important to me as they were to them. And because of that I usually found myself sitting at the bar by myself nursing a glass of water while watching couples flirting and giggling over their drinks every Saturday night. That is where I met Xantha one night in particular when she attempted to buy me a drink after seeing me sitting there all alone at the bar by myself staring blankly into space with my glass empty in front of me while everyone else around me was having fun having conversations with strangers who popped up from under their rocks around midnight happy hour-style to take advantage of someone who clearly wasn't looking for anything more than a conversation for once in his life. It was almost refreshing for someone like me who had been living such an introverted life for so long to meet someone like Xantha who seemed so different from everyone else around us at The Afternoon Snooze that night because she genuinely wanted nothing more than friendship from a stranger whom she had just met after seeing him sit there quietly staring into space for quite some time without anyone bothering him or even trying to strike up a conversation with him despite being aware that he hadn't touched his drink yet since nobody else ever went near him except for one other woman who tried buying him a drink but quickly left when he declined her offer after replying with something like 'I don't drink' or 'I don't know' or maybe 'thank you' or perhaps even nothing at all since he didn't speak much back then either because of his rather heavy accent which made it hard for others around us to understand what he was saying most of the time including myself even though we had spent quite some time together recently enough that I now understood his speech pattern pretty well which made it easier for our relationship to grow over time since we both worked day jobs at a place called The Misery Diner where we basically did nothing all day besides eating whatever food was put on our plates by the old cook named Ms Moira and occasionally talking about stuff whenever we saw each other during our breaks between shifts which were always short and never long enough especially during slow times when there were hardly any customers going through The Misery Diner's doors so we often got stuck working overtime without pay which meant that sometimes we didn't get paid at all since Ms Moira only gave us what money she thought we deserved based on how much work we did during each shift which meant that sometimes we didn't get paid at all after working overtime especially during slow times like Christmas or New Year's Eve when nobody came through The Misery Diner's doors except for the occasional customer who had nowhere else better to go so they would end up having dinner at The Misery Diner which would be quiet boring except for when Xantha would come over after work during those periods too which would be great because then I wouldn't be alone anymore during those slow times although it also meant less pay since Ms Moira only gave us money based on how many hours we worked each shift which meant less pay whenever there were slow times since no one worked during those periods except for Xantha and me but since she wanted nothing more than friendship from me all along then she never really minded working extra shifts without pay even during holidays because she probably felt guilty going home early whenever she could without any good reason except wanting extra money from Ms Moira but working extra hours without pay instead especially during slow times like Christmas since it meant less hours worked per shift thus less pay whenever Ms Moira decided not to give you any money based on how many hours you worked each shift which meant working more hours without pay whenever you could especially during slow times like Christmas especially since Ms Moira typically gives less money per hour worked whenever there aren't any customers going through The Misery Diner's doors unless you decide not to show up again which means you'll probably end up getting fired before Christmas even though Ms Moira tells new employees not to worry about showing up early or staying late or skipping breaks because it doesn't matter if you work hard or not because Ms Moira will eventually fire every employee before Christmas anyway because it's hard enough running The Misery Diner all year round especially around Christmas time when customers tend stay home instead especially if they can afford it unlike regulars like Mr Hernan whose family used to always visit The Misery Diner every year during Christmas until Mr Hernan died two years ago which means nobody visited The Misery Diner's doors anymore except for Ms Moira who stayed late every Monday through Friday morning cooking food for herself and sometimes Xantha and myself but mostly just herself since Xanthas always showed up late after work or left early before lunchtime depending on whether there were enough customers going through The Misery Diner's doors during breakfast or lunchtime respectively which usually meant leaving early before lunchtime whenever no customers showed up at all around midday-ish time while leaving late before dinner time whenever plenty of customers showed up around noon-ish time depending on whether they were regulars like Mr Hernan who used to eat lunchtime meals every day except Tuesdays when he used eat dinner-time meals instead especially on Tuesdays when he used eat lunchtime meals instead except Mondays when he used eat breakfast-time meals instead especially on Mondays when he ate dinner-time meals but only Tuesdays when he ate breakfast-time meals instead thus making Mondays his favorite day each week alongside Wednesdays outside work when he used watch football games from home on his big screen TV while chugging down ice cold cans of Bud Light beer which is why Mondays became his favorite days outside work because they reminded him of all those Tuesdays plus Fridays outside work when he also watched football games on his big screen TV while drinking ice cold cans of Bud Light beer too except Fridays reminded him more than anything else about Saturdays outside work when he would eat lunchtime meals while watching football games from home on his big screen TV while drinking ice cold cans of Bud Light beer too except Saturdays reminded him more than anything else about Sundays outside work when he would watch football games from home while eating dinner-time meals with whatever food Ms Moira made him plus whatever food Xantha brought over last minute usually right before kick off usually involving sandwiches wrapped in aluminum foil handed directly out of plastic bags purchased minutes earlier inside grocery stores located only minutes away from home so that Ms Moira wouldn't see her daughter outside work unless needed otherwise meaning as little interaction between mother and daughter as possible thus reducing potential conflicts between mother and daughter regarding father/daughter interactions outside working hours although Mr Hernan always used insist upon personally walking his daughter out the front door whenever she showed up late before kick off meaning whenever Sundays became Saturdays became Sundays became Saturdays became Monday meanings Mr Hernan finally passed away after having suffered from chronic alcoholism for far too long causing him to slowly fade away throughout the years until finally passing away peacefully just before Thanksgiving 2017 leaving behind nothing but memories made throughout countless years living together at 2351 Glendale Drive where Mr Hernan lived alone ever since Mrs Hernan died several years earlier due sudden death due accidental overdose caused by mixing various medications prescribed by various doctors across several cities including Boston, Miami, Atlanta, Los Angeles among others therefore raising daughter Xantha alone meaning practically singlehandedly alone throughout most