Unstuck: Finding the Way Forward

It was a strange day, one I won't soon forget. It was the day I learned what it was like to be truly alone.

I had always been the type of person who didn't really feel lonely; I had a lot of friends, and we were always doing something together. These friends had been my rock for as long as I could remember. But, there were days when we weren't able to spend time with each other, and that's where the problem arose.

One day, we just weren't able to get together. There were so many different things pulling us in different directions - family plans, work schedules, etc... We all tried contacting each other to find a time that worked for everyone, but it just wasn't meant to be that day. So we said our goodbyes and went on with our lives.

As the days passed by, I became more and more distressed by being away from my friends. I didn't know why this bothered me so much - I had never experienced this before, why did I now? It made me frustrated, angry, confused...

Then, it began affecting my studies. Normally I would read through my class notes once or twice a week before a test or exam, but recently I found that whenever I started a study session, my mind would wander to the thoughts of my friends. My mind would wander to how they were doing at their schoolwork. Were they learning? Was it hard for them? What were they planning on doing after school? What did they have planned for summer break? And then it hit me - we hadn't spoken since the last time we saw each other! And it had been FIVE DAYS!!!

I felt like an idiot for not realizing this sooner! How could we not have spoken in so long? We talked every single day! Even if all we did was say hello and goodbye to each other while passing in the hallway! This realization sent me into a fit of panic. How could we have let this happen?! We promised ourselves that no matter what happened in life, no matter how busy life got - even if we couldn't see each other at all - we would still talk every single day! And here we were! Five days without saying even one word to each other!

I felt sick to my stomach, like someone punched me in the gut and stole all of the air out of my lungs. This feeling consumed me until it seemed as though nothing else mattered anymore. All I wanted was to see them again - all of them; my best friends. And so, without thinking about where my actions would lead me next, without thinking about how reckless and stupid this idea was going to make me look in front of everyone else - especially those who liked me - I decided to leave everything behind and go visit them.

From the moment I began packing up my belongings into my car and driving away from home until the moment I arrived at their houses and rang their doorbells was exactly one hour and forty-nine minutes (give or take). In such a short amount of time (forgetting about getting lost twice on the way), having only packed enough clothes for one night's stay at each house (with only two pairs of underwear), eating gas station food along the way... It may sound like an impossible feat for some people; however, you must understand that these are six people who mean more to me than anyone else alive today (except for maybe my parents). Forgetting them for over five days was simply not an option. No matter how hard it got along the way (and trust me when I say "hard"), something inside kept telling me that this was what needed to be done... So here I am: ringing doorbells without any regret whatsoever... Because these are people worth leaving everything behind for...