Athena's Booming Gift

I wish my boobs were bigger.

*Sigh* I can't even wear a push-up bra without it pushing my boobs up so much that I'm spilling out of the top!

God, I'm so tired of being the butt of every joke, always having to wear baggy clothing because my breasts are so small they're practically non-existent!

This is crazy... I mean, this isn't even fair.

Today was just another day at school, watching people mock me and treating me as if I don't belong here. It was all just too much, and my eyes started to water as I walked down the hallway towards my locker. When did high school get so hard? Kids in elementary school would be playing with toys while sitting in the circle on the rug. They would be laughing, having fun...

/

All I ever wanted was to have a normal childhood. One where I could catch frogs with my friends after school and play with Barbies and... And now look at me. No friends, no one to talk to, nothing but loneliness all around me. Sometimes I wonder if life is worth living anymore; now that my mother has passed away from cancer when I was only four years old, and my father left us shortly after for another family. I... I never understood why he didn't want us. Dad was such a loving man before he found her! He used to buy me flowers and take me out for ice cream whenever we wanted to! He played games with me and bought me nice clothes when my mom wasn't home! But then he met her... And everything changed. He stopped caring about us, telling us to stay out of his way while he worked late hours into the night at the office or whatever bar he decided to spend the night at. We hardly had any money to eat or live off of anymore, but that didn't matter because mom always managed to find a way to feed us and clothe us each month until she went into surgery for what we thought was throat cancer. We were wrong. There were tumors everywhere... Brain tumor's, lung tumor's, stomach tumor's... She couldn't go through surgery because her body wouldn't be able to handle it anymore after fighting those other disease's for years! Her body was too weak by the time she was diagnosed! And now she's nothing more than an empty shell lying in bed in our living room while dad wastes his time trying not to think about our future or what will become of us without him or her! It's just not right! Life isn't fair! Why am I even alive?! What reason do I have to live?! Everything just hurts so bad... And no one understands how much pain i'm going through sometimes... Not even my dad.. He won't stop wasting his time on that woman who left him yet still claims she loves him!! It's not love though!! At least i'm not stupid enough to let someone treat me like that! While she holds onto him as if she cares about him! But she doesn't!! She'll never care about him again like she used too!! She only wants his money now!! She doesn't care about him like he does her!! Like how he used too!! She's a liar!! A cheater!! Just like dad is a cheater!! And just like everyone else at school is a cheater!! The students are cheaters because they make fun of me for being flat chested when they don't know what it feels like to be ashamed of your body every day you wake up wondering why anyone would want you if you're nothing special! They're all stupid if they think it's funny that someone has small breasts when they don't understand what it feels like being called "flat chested" or "flat chest" or "flatty" or "flat tits" or any other name along those lines everyday by everyone else at school! They say it like it's funny... As if it makes them superior some how.. But they're wrong!!! Everyone is wrong!!! No one deserves this kind of treatment from anyone else!!! People should treat others like how they want to be treated themselves!!!! If someone acts rudely towards you then call them out on their actions!!!!! Don't just ignore it because you're afraid of being rejected yourself!!! Not everyone will accept you for who you are but who cares?! You're better off alone than being around someone who thinks you need change in order for them to accept you!!! Love yourself first before finding love from anyone else!!! Never let someone tell you who you are unless they know you better than anyone else!!! If they don' know everything there is about your personality then they don't deserve knowing everything there is about your appearance!!! Don't let people tell you how you should look or dress or act or behave because it only brings negativity into your life!!! Never let people tell you who you are because YOU are who YOU are no matter what anyone says!!! You are beautiful because GOD gave YOU beauty inside AND out not because someone told YOU that YOU needed change in order for THEM to think YOU were beautiful!!! God made each one of US unique in our own ways so why try changing OURSELVES instead of making changes TOO those who think they need improving? Make those people change instead instead of changing yourselves!!! Don't let them change who YOU are into something different than WHO THEY WANT TO BE LIKE BECAUSE THAT IS ALL THEY ARE TRYING TO DO BY MAKING FUN OF OTHER PEOPLE FOR BEING DIFFERENT FROM THEM OR FOR BEING LESS THAN THEM IN TERMS OF APPEARANCE SO THEY CAN FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEMSELVES!!!! Don't give them satisfaction by letting them abuse without fighting back!!! Stand up against bullying regardless if the bully sees your point or not because IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT THEY THINK OR FEEL ABOUT YOUR REACTIONS BECAUSE IT DOESN'T MATTER IF THEY STILL WON'T STOP BULLYING YOU EVEN THOUGH YOU ADDRESSED THEIR INQUIRY INTO WHY THEY SHOULDN'T BULLY/HARASS/YELL AT YOU!!!! If they still choose not stop then just walk away from them with confidence and distance yourself from their negative energy by staying away from them!!!! Because at the end of the day hating others for things NOT EVEN IN THEIR CONTROL won't make their lives any better since EVERYONE HAS PROBLEMS AND WE ALL NEED EACH OTHER TO GET THROUGH LIFE!!!!! Life doesn't need problems but it needs solutions so why not solve these problems together as well as our own instead of staying apart so we can focus on our own goals?????? LET'S WORK TOGETHER AS ONE AND MAKE THIS WORLD A BETTER PLACE WITH POSITIVE ENERGY RATHER THAN HATEFUL ENERGY THAT ONLY DESTROYS NOTHING BUT THE PERSONS WHO PROVIDE IT!!!! Thankyou :)