Scorched Embers of Love

"You sure this is a good idea?" Ella asked nervously as she looked around the dimly lit pub.

"Of course," Nate said, reaching across the table to take her hand. "I need to tell you something."

Ella took a deep shaky breath and gave him a wary look before turning back to her drink. Nate sighed and started playing with his straw wrapper, trying to find the right words. He'd been trying ever since he suggested they meet at the pub near his house. In an attempt to distract him from his thoughts, Ella had insisted they take a walk before they went out, so they left Nate's house just after nine and walked down to the river. The sun was setting and there was still a hint of warmth in the air, but it would be cold tonight.

They sat on a small wooden bench overlooking the river and watched the colours change in front of them. They'd fallen into silence for several long minutes before Nate finally spoke up. "I don't know how to say this."

"It's okay, I get what you were saying," Ella said quietly, looking down at her shoes. "I always do."

She was shaking her head slowly as she stared at the ground, running her finger across some graffiti carved into the wood of the bench. It seemed like she was trying to figure out how much she could say with one word answers, and he didn't want that. He wanted her to look at him and make eye contact when he told her how he felt about her. But now that they were here in person he didn't know how to start without scaring her off again. It would be easy for him to make it seem like a joke or a fling if he didn't give everything he had to it, but he couldn't do that to himself anymore. Not after what happened between them last year.

"I need you," Nate said softly, taking her hand again when she met his eyes with an expression of pain mixed with longing on her face. "I've missed you so much these last few months." He reached out with his other hand to stroke her cheek gently then let it fall down against his thigh again when she winced slightly and turned away from him slightly, avoiding his touch.

She averted her eyes as he continued speaking and it broke his heart to see such sadness in them when she already had so many reasons not to be happy right now with another man. But he wasn't going to give up until he'd told her everything, even if it meant making things even more difficult for himself later on by crossing lines that shouldn't be crossed between friends who were once lovers. "Please hear me out." She looked over at him and nodded silently while tears slipped down her cheeks in silence before standing up quickly and walking away towards the exit.

Nate stood up quickly and followed after her but couldn't catch up and found himself watching helplessly through the window as she walked back along the path towards his house alone without looking back at him once, holding herself stiffly as though she was trying desperately not to cry or scream for help or something else entirely which might embarrass either of them if someone saw them together like this in public... alone... without their partners... being so close together.... talking about things that weren't strictly platonic...

Nate really hated being so transparent sometimes; especially when it came down to something like this where nothing but fate seemed capable of pushing him forward in spite of his better judgement and self-preservation instincts kicking in every step of the way all because of one person who had been steadily eroding all those carefully constructed walls around his heart since the day they first met twelve years ago on the school bus when she was new in town and stumbled onto his seat by accident with an embarrassed apology covering most of her face while waving hello shyly at everyone else too polite not to respond happily until suddenly everything went quiet because no one knew what they should do next: sit somewhere else? Start picking fights? Get up themselves and move? And then Ella had peered shyly up from behind their seats then offered them both a cute little shrug that made everyone laugh quietly before getting back into their conversations again except for Nathan who continued staring at Ella who seemed oblivious until finally realising no one wanted anything else from her anymore so looked back up at everyone else too but went redder than before when noticing Nathan staring back at her but then recovered enough not only to smile bashfully but wave shyly back from behind her seat too before sitting down again - happily ever after (except for all those endless times later where everything falls apart.)