Diapering Daisy

Daisy’s head hung low from exhaustion. She sat on the edge of her bed, hand on her forehead, eyes closed. She took a deep breath and sighed slowly. “I give up…” she whispered to herself.

She had been trying to write an essay for her anthropology class. The assignment was due in a few hours and she just couldn’t get it done. It wasn’t that she lacked the knowledge; it was just that every time she had tried to start writing the words just got jumbled in her mind. Everything was so intertwined with her personal life that it was impossible to separate them out and just focus on the assigned topic.

The professor had assigned one of Daisy’s favorite subjects; the Cognitive Revolution Revolution. Daisy loved history, but especially loved anything to do with modern society and how our minds work (among other things).

The professor wanted students to explore how the brain has evolved over time and how this has changed us as human beings. He said they could take whatever angle they wanted, whether looking at how our minds have adapted from early humans to modern times or how societal pressures have shaped our decisions and actions, or even how culture influences who we are and what we believe in.

Daisy was going for the latter. She was exploring how the need for social acceptance can change who we are as individuals and how our surroundings affect us more than we realize. The idea came from experiences in her own life where she struggled with social interaction and found herself making decisions based on what others would think of her rather than what she really wanted to do – usually resulting in feelings of guilt afterwords when she realized she really didn’t want to do something but had let peer pressure overwhelm her better judgement.

It seemed like such an obvious thing once you were aware of it but it was easy to miss if you didn’t look for it, especially when you were young. But the older you got, the less self-doubt you felt when deciding things for yourself because… well… you were older! You knew better! If a friend suggested doing something dangerous, or weird, or just plain wrong, you wouldn’t think twice and confidently tell them not to be silly! And yet somehow when you were younger you never thought twice of doing stupid things as long as your friends were doing it too – recklessly jumping off cliffs into lakes thinking your buddies would catch you (the reality of which most often meant broken bones) or taking drugs thinking it would be fun because your friends thought it was fun (somehow never realizing those same friends were just as scared as you were about getting caught).

What Daisy found interesting about these thoughts though was not just why people did stupid things together but why they still did them alone without any pressure from their peers? Often times people would rationalize their behavior by saying they did things because they really wanted to do them… but really? Why would anyone go bungee jumping alone? Or try skydiving? Or even ride a motorcycle? Those were all risky activities that carried significant risk of injury or death – often times giving little reward beyond adrenaline rush. Why risk death by jumping off a cliff into water when you could jump into the air instead? Well… maybe there is some sort of thrill seeking aspect involved but even then why not go skydiving? You get all that excitement plus a parachute! Yet people still jumped off cliffs risking life and limb when they could make safer choices elsewhere… regardless of whether others were doing it or not. So where did this desire come from? Where did this need for social acceptance come from?

It wasn’t something Daisy could answer definitively but she could theorize about the situation based on personal experiences and observations during her time at college where she had seen many bizarre behaviors from teenagers trying desperately to fit in with one another – often times leading ridiculous lifestyles that made little sense considering their age and circumstances. The summer before college started however she had read an article about something called Baby Dystopia Syndrome written by Professor Carver – he was an expert in psychology who taught at her university and wrote a lot about real world issues like mental illness and suicide prevention – Daisy remembered reading his articles several years back while researching different topics related to psychology online. The article described kids who refused to grow up despite being in adulthood – including those who continued living at home well into adulthood despite having jobs and families of their own, or those who chose never to marry because they preferred having meaningless relationships with multiple partners instead of settling down with someone special who might tie them down emotionally – relationships that ended quickly before they ever really began causing those involved more hurt than good – ultimately making those involved feel worse about themselves rather than better… driving them further away from needing companionship rather than bringing them closer together… until eventually there was no hope left for these individuals who spiraled into depression forcing them back home where they spent years wallowing in self pity until dying alone surrounded by old toys pretending they were still young kids playing house rather than adults whose responsibilities included paying bills, cleaning up after themselves, getting jobs, feeding themselves; basically everything adults needed to do while being adults except acting like adults (aka maturing).

The cycle repeats itself generation after generation until everyone is dead or suffering from permanent psychological damage thanks to baby dystopia syndrome coupled with a society that doesn't recognize its role in contributing towards this issue by allowing children growing up today act like children indefinitely while forcing adults growing up today act like adults indefinitely - creating an imbalance between generations that feeds off itself until society is reduced to nothing more than a bunch of children pretending they're not grownups avoiding responsibilities while being told by older generations acting like grownups acting responsible is childish... rarely stopping long enough to realize both sides are merely playing dress up pretending this isn't their reality... preferring what's easy over what's right... preferring lies over truth... preferring hypocrisy over meaning... preferring selfishness over sacrifice... preferring indifference over caring... preferring failures over success... preferring bad over good... preferring pain over pleasure... preferring dead ends over roads leading somewhere... preferring darkness over light... preferring sickness over health... preferring ignorance over knowledge... preferring hate over love…

Daisy stopped reading at this point realizing why she couldn’t write an essay on this topic earlier today - everything was connected! She wasn’t sure why though; all she knew was every paragraph reminded her of personal anecdotes and experiences tied directly back into what she had been thinking about recently - everything somehow tied together under one overarching theme: Social Acceptance! And now here she sat staring at an empty word document unable to write anything because now everything was so interconnected it felt overwhelming - jumbled - confused! How can everything be connected!? How can everything connect back everywhere?! There must be some clue Daisy missed somewhere! Some key piece of information connecting everything together like a string connecting beads forming a necklace! Something permeating through everything else - something magic tying everything together so if one thread breaks then everything breaks! But what?! What is it?! What connects all these threads together!? What is the key?! What is the answer!?

And then suddenly Daisy realized what lay at the center of all these thoughts: Herself! It all comes back around to me! This can only be about me because I am experiencing this all first hand! This is my nightmare! This is my struggle! This is my life!! That must be why I can't stop thinking about myself! I'm worried about my future career prospects due to my struggles socially impacting my ability to feel confident around others which could reduce my options regarding potential employment or opportunities I might otherwise have if I wasn't struggling like I am today!! If I get fired then I'll never find another job again!! People will talk behind my back saying I'm unemployable!! My parents will disown me once they learn the truth!!! Everyone will shun me!! They'll call me crazy!!! They'll call me a freak!!! They'll say "I told ya so!"!!! They'll say "I told ya she wasn't normal…"!!! They'll say "Look what happened…"!!! Look what happened when I trusted Holly!!! Holly ruined my life!! Holly led me astray!!!! Holly turned me into a monster!!!! A monster forced into diapers by Holly because Holly made me feel guilty for choosing diapers instead of surgery!!! Now I'm stuck wearing diapers 24/7 thanks to Holly's bullshit decision making skills ruining my career!!!!! Ruining my life!!! Ruining everything!!!!! Oh God oh God oh God please help me please help me please help me please help me please help me please help m e pleeeeeeeeeeeease!!!!!!!!!!!!